Finger still hurts- but that won’t stop me from typing. Didn’t end up getting x-ray because dad booked for the weekend (I thought he said “tomorrow” yesterday- but I heard wrong apparently). Damn.
Today, being the genius I am, I forgot to slip my SD card into my camera…again. YEAH- Humdiho. Oh well. Lots of photos were taken today on other cameras because it was MUFTI and prefect luncheon for outgoing prefects. Ladilaah.
Who’s up for a mini-discussion?
5-10 years down the road- you’ve been going out with your significant other half for a few years, don’t feel like getting married, but perhaps moving in together feels appropriate? Would you move in together before you get married? or after?
Back when I was a kid, I’d immediately think “AFTER MARRIAGE OF COURSE!” because that’s what my parents have always said. However, I know a lot of other people who would reject that because it was highly “impractical”. Their argument was that the longer you live with someone, the more you know about them (i.e. annoying habits, conflicting perspectives, moral values, etc) and from that you can decide whether you want to spend the rest of your life with them.
It makes sense when you think about it like that.
From my parents point of view- this is something you should find out/know without having to live with them for a certain amount of time. A girl/woman should be er “untainted” before marriage, and I guess a couple moving in together does suggest err- you know what I mean. I bring this up because recently, I think one of my cousins wanted to go on an overseas trip with her bf but my aunt said “NO DEFINITELY NOT” and gave the above reason.
Dootdidoot.
I’m not saying that moving in together definitely means night time activities will occur (like the movies teach us- they can happen anywhere, anytime) but I guess it seems that way from a third person’s perspective. “You shouldn’t care about what other people think.” Regardless of however many times people say this to me, it will rarely happen. How people perceive you affects how they treat you.
Tell me what you think. I understand the arguments on both sides- valuing different things. My parents view sounds a bit.. materialistic? But it’s something I think I’ll value, while the other view sounds very practical and.. er open I guess.
Speaking of changing attitudes, here’s something funny I noticed on the way to school a couple of days ago. Some junior girls with miniscule skirts walked past the crossing and my dad made a disapproving tsk sound while shaking his head muttering something like “kids these days” under his breath. Hahaha. I think I’m a younger version of my dad. I walk past shops like supre and see some tiny strips of fabric sold as “skirts” and I can’t help but think “you might as well go without”. Ahh conservative for the win. Showing too much skin is not necessary – but I’m finding it becoming accepted by society more nowadays.
Time to compare? I was watching a HK documentary about prostitution and I noticed the clothes that prostitutes wear can easily be found in an Australian girl’s wardrobe. When I was watching, I had NO idea the girls were prostitutes. I thought they were normal girls and I was waiting for the part where some guy injects them with heroin and turns them into completely hopeless beings and witnessing their change from normal -> hooker. But they were already in hooker mode/clothing which was quite an eye opener.
In other words, I could rock up to a restaurant in HK in my singlet top and denim skirt + flip flops, and declare I was a hooker without anyone doubting me.
Dootdidoot. Okay I have nothing else to say. The fact that I almost said I dress like an Asian hooker kind of left me speechless.
OHMYGAWD SO LITTLE DAYS AT RUSE LEFT
Ooh Some photos from our Cadet dinner :)
We went on Monday night (21st September) to a place called Steamboat in Epping. It's in the genesis building. Meal? Basically an all-you-can-eat-hotpot. SUITED ME PERFECTLY. I could ate lots.
21 screams of joy:
I forgot my SD card once last week too.
I am also ultra-conservative.
But liberal in things like gender equality.
1. Move in together whenever you feel like it. Stuff marriage. Methinks knowing the other person is a lot more important. Take note, Ted Hughes and Sylvia Plath.
2. I dislike revealing-er clothing. Hell, I even dislike guys not wearing shirts, mainly because it feels so exposed and vulnerable.
3. Cadet dinner was very nice. You should have posted our pasty face + Shiling. Herf.
omg i finally figured out how to comment joy!!! ahah
anyways matters concerning the moving in topic. I feel that moving in is a much bigger step than marriage. Why? cos when you get married it is simple legalising your relationship and putting it down on paper. Cos nothing really changes. It is simply the traditional choices after marriage that affect the relationship. Ok its a lil confusing but lets say i get married and once that happens we start thinking about the mortgage, kids bladiblah oh and placing our names on christmas cards together (i stole it off everybody loves ray).
BUt you see with moving in, you really have to dedicate yourself to cleaning after your man and putting up with their strange habits that everyone seems to claim that that is what makes them love them more. Not so sure how that works
BELLEE
your dad is awesome !
and nigger please, who would want to stalk sunny ? her and zeke alone is just wackkkkkkk .
i am very disgusted . D:
HOTPOT LOOKS AWESOMEEEEE, ive been curious to know how that place is since it opened up.
and the moving in thing - i think FREEDOM
and i also hate on lack of conservatism but at times i could be a hypocrite xD
oops .
Moving in; depends on the type of person, i guess? imo, if you move in; only so at earliest before marriage [reduce temptation]. besides, your life does NOT centre aroudn them ,and vice versa [hopefully].
2. revealing clothing.... its public indecency for both genders >_>. But these days, its called "fashion" bah, humbug.
3. cadet dinner! wheres the video of buddha?! D:
cheryl here:
:O:O i've been to that hotpot place with some badminton friends. that place kicked us out coz they said we'd been in there for too long =( we were onli there for arnd 2.5 hrs...
Move in after marriage I reckon. I know people who date and sleep over at each other's places (they're 20+), but I reckon that's ok, as long as they're not sleeping in the same bed or something =O I dunno.. I think I'm kinda conservative.
And it's funny how the less material used to make two similar articles of clothing (that's worn on the outside), the more expensive it tends to be =)
@details: i hate forgetting. :( I keep forgetting. Nothing wrong with being uper conservative BD
@darth: i loled at your #2. BAHA why would i post a pasty pic of me D:
@simple dreamer: yeah i thought moving in would be harder too :/ the thing i'm most afraid of is strange habits i guess
@janet: she's so fug. i want her off the show. D: i know zeke is dying inside. D:
@z-hang: YES! "fashion" they call it.
@cheryl: D: THEY KICKED YOU OUT? we only stayed about that long too :P
@quentin: i agree on your last point. FREAKING HELL. ITS STUPID!
Belinda, I have already expressed my views on the clothes you should wear. Get those JEANS. haha
jokes
the cupcake packaging is totally fetch!
peace & love
thashan
Tell me, how can someone live with their partner and ensure that "night time activities" do not occur? :S To me, that's like saying that you buy a box chocolate, but can stare it at on ends without eating it (or a dish that someone really likes, if they do not like chocolate), and throwing it away...
Okay, maybe that was a bad analogy. But I do not know (or have not heard of) any couples who live together and do not perform the forementioned "activities".
And it's not just about conservative views either. As you know there are 'consequences' for these actions and that no contraceptive is 100%. Condoms are made from machines and believe it or not, they do break, or come off and get stuck in places. Also birth control for women has something like a 0.1% failure rate (IIRC). And, most couples who are not married aren't ready to have children.
Plus, it brings all the emotional baggage when you break up etc... Not to mention the risk of STIs and what not.
i totally agree with simple dreamer and topher loafer on a sofa hehe. speaking of which, i miss Everybody Loves Raymond :( the biggest challenge in a relationship is how you and your..mate survive living together under the same roof with problems, responsibilities which you'll have to share with him. It'd be too late if you married him and you don't like the way he,,say sings in the shower etc. and belle, you dirty minded girl, just cos you move in with someone doesn't mean you have to perform night time activities =__="
on the other hand, i talked to mum about it and she reckons that living together before marriage takes the fun out of marriage and the excitement. there are more ways to judge and decide if he's the right guy without having to live with him. And more often than not, night time activites to happen all too naturally and consequences are not always favourable.
LOL too much skin is distracting. girls want to be treated with decency and respect. if they dress decently and appropriately, they'll get the respect that they want. i guess we're all pretty conservative in this aspect.
raw food never looks appetising, not until it's cooked :) cadet dinner looks awesome, can't wait till our music one =D
you know what else looks awesome, your dad's design. i was quite blown away. very nice =D
Short skirt and other revealing clothing to me is pretty bimbo. Steering away from that sounds sophisticated xD.
And yeah I reckon move in after marrying. Because the more you know someone, the more you expect the person to act like you (you know how the more friends you are with someone, generally the more likely you'll be on the same wavelength) in situations, when they wont because everyone's unique. Then you'll have pretty unreasonable expectations about each other = more fights = breakup. Having said that getting to know the other person is pretty important I suppose. Prime example Ted Hughes and Sylvia Plath.
Thats what I think anyway, probably huge gaps in my logic haha.
@Thashan: WHAT JEANS. WHY CAN'T YOU DRESS LIKE KRIS?! He get so much attention ;D
@Anon: are you Rohan? Yes. I agree with everything you say. But I guess night time activities might not DEFINATELY happen- but it definately increases the chances of it happening. Gad what th ehell am i talking about :P
@krissybubbles: once you move in with someone- the spare time + discreet location (inside home) + OWN FURNITURE could definately speed up some kind chemistry going on between people. Like anon said. It's like buying a box of chocolates and just leaving it on the top shelf of the pantry. I lust for chocolate, and I know I would do anything to be left alone in the pantry so I could climb up and get it asap. (Just to make sure, I said CHOCOLATE, I don't mean night time activities).
@ms: i agree with what you say. and i hate how both you and topher use ted hughs and sylvia plath as an example because i SERIOUSLY have not read/heard the story of it yet. ==;
I would think move in after marriage. =) All the reasons hae been said already.
And I laughed so hard at your HK documentary comparison!! X) You should so try the whole skirt, singlet top, flipflops combo in HK one day xD and take photos of people reactions when you announce it XDXD jokes jokes XD
Your dad is making cupcakes?? How cool =D
Wait. I see Woolworths on the box. Ahh what? Confused ==
"But I guess night time activities might not DEFINATELY happen"
--> I'd say that there's a 0.999999.... chance or probability, which basically is 1 (well, approaches 1).
How can you ensure that "it" definitely wont happen? In most cases (if not all) it will happen due to human nature.
If you think you can abstain from that whilst living together, then I think that you need to think again.
Belle watching random documentarys crack me up xD
But yes, fashion= strange these days...
Resist the temptation when moving in together
Your dad's design is awesome
I need to eat one of those pecan danishes still...
That is all xD
It can make financial sense to move in together, and yes, it will give you a good indication of if your girl's sandwich-making skills are up to scratch..hoho.
But seriously, it's up to you and your partner to decide if, why, and how you will move in together. On a slight tangent, I know of people who've only married because of the tax benefits, and they were perfectly comfortable living together as defacto partners.
Sexytimes is up to the views of the girl, obviously.
lolol belle the hk hooker
jokes
"I know of people who've only married because of the tax benefits"
LOL Milo
The moving in Q: Don't really have an opinion. If you've gone out with the person for a few years already, you should already have a good idea of who they are as a person. I guess if it feels appropriate, then why not? Although that would beg the question, why haven't you been married yet if you feel like you're ready to move in?
@alice &jason: stop laughing at my HK hooker analogy D: I sort of regret saying that (though i couldn't help but laugh at my own joke in the beginning).
@anon: you make everyone sound like sex maniacs
@milo: financial sense? ;D
@joseph: "why haven't you been married yet if you feel like you're ready to move in?" is a very appropriate question which didn't occur to me :/ why? I don't know. XD it's just becoming increasingly common :/
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